Local Authority: Old Growth

Olympia’s own World Beard Champ explains his hirsute pursuit

Name: Burke Kenny
On culinary options: “The easiest thing is burritos, and anything that can be sucked through a straw.”
The bummer about rainy days: “A beard can feel like wet spaghetti on your face.”
Training regimen: “I eat a lot of protein because hair is basically dead protein, lots of B vitamins and horsetail. Your beard reflects your health, so no steroids.”

If you have any doubts about facial hair making a comeback, you haven’t met Burke Kenny. The 24-year-old Olympia native is the reigning world champion of beard and moustache competitors—“full beard, styled moustache” division. After placing fifth at the 2005 World Beard and Moustache Championships in Berlin, he took the crown at the 2007 biennial event in England. But it’s not all fame and glory—Kenny warns that serious competitors must “kiss their faces goodbye.” Since earning a degree in music from Evergreen State College in 2009, he’s been working as a prep cook, thumping bass for the blues rock band As The Devil Dances—and of course, preparing to defend his title on May 23 in Anchorage, at the 2009 world championships. 

S.M.: How did you get involved with competitive beard growing?
B.K.: When I was 20, I decided to buckle down and commit to something. It was a great excuse to go to Berlin for the 2005 competition.
S.M.: At 24, you’re a young upstart in beard growing. How is the old guard handling your success?
B.K.: The first time [I competed]…I was the youngest guy there, and the majority of everyone else was at least over 40 or 50—mostly older retired European guys. The thing is, a lot of…the older guys who are the superstars now are, I hate to say it, but they’re dying off. I think the beard competition is in transition, because it’s getting more popular and youth culture is getting more interested in it.
S.M.: Are there places you won’t go because your beard would be jeopardized?
B.K.: I won’t go to the mall. I get a lot of weird looks, and mall security follows me. Sometimes I avoid intense social situations like bars. When people get drunk and all friendly, they have a tendency to just reach out and grab it, especially women.
S.M.: Does the beard make it easier to get dates?
B.K.: If anything, it makes it harder. In nature, the appearance of an enlarged jaw is an intimidating factor—that might have something to do with it. Some people say (not me) that I have a masked face, which can be unsettling.
S.M.: Do you receive any payment for your beard work?
B.K.: I guess you can say I get a lot of free beers around town. I use Tresemme hairspray, so people say I should try to be a model for them, but I think they’re probably going for something a little more feminine.